Think twice
Not mistakes. Just the fifth-best use of the money, sold as the first.
Everything below is genuinely lovely. The problem is only what it displaces.
| What it is | The honest note |
|---|---|
| The freestanding bath | Beautiful, and it uses a great deal of water in a place where water is trucked or pumped. Most people use it once. |
| The private plunge pool | Genuinely good in the middle of the day. Ask what overlooks it and which way it faces — a great many are in shade by two in the afternoon. |
| The suite upgrade | Above the entry level the room is already excellent. Extra square metres are the least noticeable money you can spend on a safari. |
| The outdoor shower | Wonderful at four in the afternoon. Cold at 5.30 in the morning in June, which is when you will actually be using it. |
| The helicopter transfer | Spectacular for twenty minutes, priced like a night at a very good camp. Worth doing once, where it replaces a genuinely bad drive rather than a short flight. |
Why these are the ones you are shown
Not because anybody is being dishonest. Because they are the only things that photograph.
You cannot photograph a vehicle cap written into a lease, or a guide who anticipates, or the difference between two nights and three. You can photograph a bath with a view, and so that is what appears on every website in the market, including the very good ones.
The one on that list we would still take
The plunge pool, conditionally. The middle of a safari day is hot and long — out at six, back at eleven, out again at four — and somewhere to be in water for two hours genuinely improves it.
But ask the two questions: what overlooks it, and which way does it face. A pool in shade from two o’clock is decoration.
What we would do with the same money
| Instead of | Take |
|---|---|
| The suite upgrade for a week | Two extra nights in the standard tent |
| The helicopter transfer | A private vehicle for three days |
| A night at a much grander camp | A guide assigned to you for the whole stay |
| The spa package | One more night on the coast, where you would have had a massage anyway |
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